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On a chilly winter’s evening, in my living room near Cleveland,I met up with a wireless plug-and-play poker game.It hooks up to my TV, with fifteen games to choose from.I played ten hours in a row, and the machine began to speak.
It said, “Son, you can’t resist my enticing Texas Hold ‘Em.Don’t bother trying to [...]
The path of Woot is not always the clearest, but great enlightenment awaits those who can follow it. Those of who grasped the elusive idea behind Contest 57 turned in some remarkably clever ideas. (So did some of you who didn’t get it, which entries were sadly of no use to us.) So clever, in [...]
By Odin’s beard, it’s all about the packaging! When a consortium of hardware manufacturers came together in 1998 to develop an open standard for wireless interconnectivity, they knew that they couldn’t give it some boring name like the Open Standard for Wireless Connectivity. Nay, a heroic, steadfast moniker would turn their project into the stuff [...]
Undistinguished. Middling. Run of the mill. Any good thesaurus will
have at least a dozen more descriptions of your pedestrian, ordinary,
passable existence. You trudge from bed to work to TV to bed, never
tasting the transcendent, never daring to sup deeply at the trough of
the sublime. When it’s all over, what will your prudent moderation have
gotten you? [...]
Maybe you’ve got a kid who’s bugging you about learning guitar. Maybe you’ve been tempted yourself. A word of caution: one look into your closet should give you pause before you go throwing money at some new, ephemeral enthusiasm. The water skis. The jai-alai racket. The calligraphy set. The unicycle. They’re all trying to tell [...]
Good day sir/madam and hope that this message find you in good health.
Firstly my name is Mary Goodman TAYLOR, wife of recently disgraced former president Mr. Charles TAYLOR
of Liberia. My partner in London has vouchsafed for your
trustworthiness in matters of business as a reliable person of
unimpeachable character. God willing I seek a prompt urgent response [...]
Everybody knows how bitter it feels to just barely miss the awesomest photograph ever photographed. Just a second late to the shutter release and the Congressman stops picking his nose, the penny you’d balanced on its edge falls over, the presumed-extinct hummingbird flutters out of frame. Today’s Vivitar camera offers a Burst mode that rapidly [...]
Everyblogger’s talking at us, but we don’t hear a word they’re saying - until we bother to type “woot.com” into a blog search. It seems Woot-related chatter, as our pals at the NSA would put it, has increased exponentially since we last took stock of the situation. Why come? Well, most of the blame goes [...]
Hey, we’re not homewreckers. We’d never want to come between you and
your mouse. We know you two have been through a lot over the years.
You’ve got a good thing going. Neither one of you can imagine life
without the other, and that’s how it should be. We’d never dream of
suggesting you replace your existing mouse.
But then, [...]
Oh, give me a home theatre with 5.1 speakers… despite the
name, you won’t find these Pioneers sitting around a campfire amid
sagebrush and manure, unless you’ve got really eccentric taste in
interior design. No, this 1000-watt surround-sound system is equally at
home in urban, suburban, semi-urban, exurban, and rural settings ?
anywhere people crave lifelike theatre sound on a [...]
The year was 1995, a time of titans and dreamers. A nation breathed a
sigh of relief when the arrest of public enemy Kevin Mitnick finally
brought his brutal campaign of terror to an end. Musical legends like
Boyz II Men and Hootie & the Blowfish electrified a generation. And
UN peacekeepers withdrew from Somalia after establishing the freedom,
order, [...]
Grrrrr! Your humble Woot blogger is fighting through day two of a
monster migraine, so I’ll cut the cute stuff and move quickly on to
bidness. Thanks to a widespread outbreak of Photoshop excellence, we
had a monster of a job wrangling the champeens from your 300+ entries -
so much so that we’re expanding our list of honorees [...]
To: Media Relations Division
From: OBL
Well guys, we’re starting to see the infidel press reviews of our
latest audio release, and they’re not good. First of all, the heathens
had to subject the thing to two days’ worth of analysis just to be sure
it was my voice! Then CNN said “Poor quality.” CBS called it
“Insignificant.” And the most [...]
The joke’s on you, working-class race fans. The dirty little secret of
auto racing is that it’s THE rich boys’ sport. Forget polo, golf, and
insider trading: when today’s fatcat needs to get the competitive
juices flowing, he sinks a few million into a racing team and kicks
back to huff the noxious fumes of victory. The races themselves [...]
We’ve got a printer, a printer for you, baby.
It’s got an LCD view, baby.
It may seem like nothing new, but baby,
Got a pic? Make a print!
It’s got eight different colors of ink
At forty-eight hundred dpi -
Honey, everything’s coming up HP Photosmart 8450!
You can edit it! You can view it!
Don’t even need a computer to do [...]
Trademark court is in recess! The engineers at Monster Cable have
taken time out from giving sworn depositions to bring us their
All-in-One Home Theatre Connection Kit. While this mass of cables would
make a splendid possum nest, it’s so much more, promising to improve
your home theatre performance by coating everything in more precious
metals than the Periodic Table. [...]
Ah, Monster Cable. No matter how many courts adjudicate against you, no
matter how many bitter enemies you make, no matter how many non-cable
businesses are allowed to keep the name “Monster,” you persist in your
quixotic tilting at trademark windmills. Why the rage, my combative
little friend? Who are you really fighting - that Monster in the
mirror? If [...]
This just wouldn’t be a blog without the occasional apology for not posting often enough, so here goes: I’ll be the first to admit that lately we’ve been remiss in keeping this web log updated with thrilling, insightful, exclusive content. All I can say is, YOU try juggling the demands of work, family, Civilization IV, [...]
Greetings, primitive man! Welcome to the future! Welcome to a world
where making bread is as simple as scanning a barcode, dumping in some
ingredients, and retreating to your leisure module to consume
optico-sonic entertainments!
Yeah, right. The brainiacs at
Beyond try to make a big deal about the barcode scanner on the
confusingly-titled Beyond Smart iCEBOX Bread Maker, but we’d [...]
On the surface, nothing about this portable audio system should make us
angry. Altec Lansing delivers a solid-sounding, convenient way to
amplify the contents of your iPod, and to charge it up during downtime.
Bass and treble alike sound full and rich, thanks to a Class D
amplifier, four full-range microdrivers, and something Altec unwisely
calls “revolutionary MaxxBass technology.” It [...]
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